Posted by
Grampus on Saturday, October 14, 2006 10:39:28 AM
One of the most feared things for liberal Democrats during the election cycle is the strength of the Christian values voters. All of their attempts to gain support among this constituency have failed miserably. Thus, in all of their combined elitist wisdom, they have now adopted a strategy of creating their own values based voting constituency. The main thrust of their efforts seem to be aimed at the 5% of voters classifying themselves as moderates that vote and swing elections one way or another...this group was targeted since moderates really don't know what they want anyway. Their biggest problem so far has been the lack of passion by the moderates to actually complete this task.
Cult Construction Set"Build your own Religious Cult within minutes"
Is the glass half empty of half full? That all depends upon who is looking at it. The case is similar with the Bible. For thousands of years man has been putting his own spin on Religion and the Scriptures and now so can you. Simply select the beliefs that are most advantageous to you and ‘The Cult Construction Set’ will generate actual Bible scriptures to support these beliefs. Now you too can start your own Cult in the comfort of your home!
So let’s begin! Let The Cult Construction Set create your own personal Cult.
No religion would be complete without a catchy name, so the first thing we need to do is create a name for your newly founded Cult. Click on the button and the Cult Construction Set will assign you one. Or, you can create your own title:
SELECT A NAME FOR YOUR NEW RELIGION
Atheists for Jesus
Christ’s Little Helpers
The Church of the Holy Trinity and Some Guy Named Gary
Other:(Please use only alpha numeric characters for your cult's title.)
Now we need to select which behavior your cult will support. This is a great opportunity to justify any deviant actions in which you may be personally involved in.
WHICH ONE OF THESE PRACTICES WILL YOUR CULT SUPPORT
Alcoholism
Anorexia
Obesity
Polygamy
Slam Dancing
As in any Religion you will need to have someone to look down upon in order to feel better about yourself. So select the activity your cult will support and the Cult Construction Set will find actual Scriptures to justify your actions against all heathens.
WHICH ONE OF THESE ACTIONS WILL YOUR CULT SUPPORT
anti-Semitism
Gay Bashing
Justifiable Murder due to Adultery
One of the best things about having your own cult, is the ability to support your deviant sexual preferences. Simply select the Sexual Fetish which you enjoy the most and the Cult Construction Set will help you Biblically support them.
SELECT WHICH SEXUAL FETISH YOUR NEW RELIGION WILL ALLOW
Bestiality
Pedophilia
Child Pornography
Exhibitionism
Foot Fetish
Homosexuality
Leather Fetish
Nymphomania
S&M
Scat
Watersports
There is nothing that brings the people together faster than the threat of the 'end times' and the Second Coming. So lets choose a person who you believe may be the Messiah.
WHICH ONE OF THESE IS THE MESSIAH WALKING AMONG US:
Johnny Winter
O.J. Simpson
The Messiah has not come yet.
Fear has been a great tactic for keeping people in the Religion. To have fear work for you, choose who you believe the Anti-Christ may be.
PICK WHO YOU THINK MIGHT BE THE ANTI-CHRIST
George W. Bush
Judge Wapner
The Dali Lama
The Dark one is not yet with us.
Grampus